Ten Unique Songs To Listen To This Christmas
December 24th, 2012 8:30am EST
Christmas seems to be the only holiday that has an entire genre of music dedicated to it. Christmas music seems to show up on the radio early each year, and yet every time it does it brings the same played out standards with it, and there is very little fresh air in the genre. Some artists even go as far as to turn classics from their catalog of songs into sell out Christmas disasters (Cheap Trick), but even this does little to make things interesting. So this year, instead of listening to the Pandora christmas station, why not listen to some bizarre, compelling, and even partially offensive Christmas music. It might even help to get your relatives to leave earlier.
10. "Christmas Unicorn" Sufjan Stevens
The first question that needs to be asked about this song is "what exactly is a Christmas unicorn?" Well, Sufjan answers that question (kind of) throughout the course of the song, but ultimately it doesn't really matter, because the chorus is insanely catchy. It also masterfully turns into a cover of Joy Division's "Love Will Tear Us Apart" because, well, why not?
9. "Christmas with the Devil" Spinal Tap
Every band that wants to make money has to create a Christmas song, right? Well, I this had to be one of the reasons that the joke band from perhaps the greatest mockumentary ever, This is Spinal Tap, had to put their own spin on the genre, in the form of "Christmas with the Devil." It's overly dramatical, nonsensical, and simply Spinal Tap at their finest.
8. "Christmas at Ground Zero" Weird Al
Well, the supposive Mayan apocalypse has come and gone, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't prepare yourself for the next apocalypse with some fitting songs. In case you need some holiday themed world ending music, Weird Al's got you covered.
7. "Must Be Santa" Bob Dylan
He may have a voice that sounds like gravel bouncing off a belt sander, but that didn't stop him from creating a Christmas album (which makes for a hilarious gag gift, by the way). This track is exceptionally hilarious, featuring painful accordian playing, cliche and annoying sing along vocals, and a break neck pace that helps to turn the song into a vertigo simulator.
6. "Christmas in Harlem" Kanye West
"This is far better than it could have been" is probably the best way to describe this track by Kanye and his rap collective G.O.O.D. music. For once, Kanye doesn't take himself too seriously here, and the beat is sublime (which isn't a surprise). If you can only listen to one Christmas rap song this year, this should be the one.
5. "Santa's Beard" They Might Be Giants
They Might Be Giants are probably the only band that could write a song about Santa breaking up their home. It's a fun song, and a suitable replacement for the creepy "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus."
4. "Back Door Santa" Clearence Carter
While we're on the subject of jealousy and Santa, might as well discuss this classic soul song about a guy who "comes running with his presents every time you call." Also, some might find this song a tad bit offensive.
3. "Christmas in Hollis" Run DMC
This song sampled the last song on the list, thus passing on the unique Christmas song torch onto another generation. This is probably the most recognized song on the list, and that probably has a lot to do with the fact that Run DMC somehow managed to make a Christmas song without "selling out."
2. "Please Daddy (Don't Get Drunk This Christmas)" John Denver
This song is both tragic and hilarious at the same time. It's easy to feel bad for the narrator of the song, but the whole thing is so cheesy and such a victim of it's time, making it impossible to take the song seriously. This should be a karaoke standard.
1. "I Was Born On Christmas Day" Saint Etienne
EDM seems to be all the rage these days, so the perfect addition to any stale Christmas soundtrack is this (mid 90's) get on the floor track by Saint Etienne. This will at least hold you over until Skrillex/Deadmau5 release their Xmas song.
Photo Credits: New Media Strategies