10 Songs That Should Never Be Sung At Karaoke
April 14th, 2013 2:00pm EDT
The idea of singing in front of a large group of strangers is often a terrifying one, but luckily karaoke exists to allow for this with little or no pressure on the singer. Alcohol is also usually a contributing factor to the lack of pressure, but still it gives the chance for those who can't normally sing or are afraid of performing the chance to get up in front of others (who may or may not be intoxicated) and sing and perform. There are plenty of great songs to sing at karaoke, but there are a few particular ones that should be avoided at all cost. Here are ten of those songs.
10. "Who Let the Dogs Out?" The Baha Men
Nostalgia for the 90's seems to be all the rage these days, but there are certain things that should be left in the past. "Who Let the Dogs Out" should not only be left in the past, but also should be burned, buried, and it should be forbidden to speak about. It also serves as a karaoke dj's worst nightmare, because people usually sign up for it despite only knowing the incredibly simplistic yet incredibly stupid chorus. Only sing this if you like being hated by a large group of people at the same time.
9. "I Want to Know What Love Is" Foreigner
Power ballads were all the rage in the 80's. It is now 2013, however, and that rage has since died down and has turned into old age. Unless your hair is more obnoxious than the excessively loud keyboard in the background of this (seriously, it sounds like it was recorded at twice the volume of any other instrument on the track), please don't sing this song.
8. "With Arms Wide Open" Creed
This is quite possibly one of the most pathetic songs ever written, and singing it terribly at 1 a.m. is definitely not going to help it's credibility in any way, unless you sing it ironically in a super low pitched voice.
7. "I Will Always Love You" Whitney Houston
I would hope that Whitney Houston personally haunts everyone who butchers this song, but I don't even think that ghosts have schedules that are that flexible. Seriously, no one can sing like Houston could, so just let this one die peacefully (oops, too soon?)
6. "I Touch Myself" The Divinyls
This song made it onto my guilty pleasure road trip song list, but it should only be sung in the comfort of your car where others don't have to hear it. Seriously, unless you like making people really uncomfortable, avoid this one. If you really like making people uncomfortable though, I would also recommend skipping this and heading right into some 2 Live Crew.
5. "Bodies" Drowning Pool
Some of you may read this and wonder, "Hmm, why would anyone ever sing a song like that at karaoke?" Unfortunately, some people do, and those people tend to ruin whatever fun everyone else is having.
4. "Tom Sawyer" Rush
"Tom Sawyer" is a stellar song, and one of the best rock anthems ever. However, it also features long instrumental passages that leave the singer with nothing to do (other than air bass if they're fans of "I Love You Man") and leaves the next singer in line angry that they have to waste their precious time waiting for the guy singing the song to be done just standing in place while checking his phone.
3. "My Humps" Black Eyed Peas
I have yet to ever see anyone sing this song at karaoke, but dread the day when someone is going to. This song, to be tactful, was less than stellar when the Peas performed it, and will not be made better when sung by a couple of frat boys or drunken moms, because those are the only two groups that would probably perform this.
2. "My Heart Will Go On" Celine Dion
If it came between freezing to death in the cold Atlantic or having to hear this song again, I would like to think that most people would choose the first option, having at least spared their ear drums if nothing else. If someone really wants to sing this song, then they should accept the fact that they audience can "iceberg" them at any moment, also known as throwing large chunks of bar ice at them (or urinal cakes if those are more readily available).
1. Anything by Nickelback
Nickelback might be the most hated band on the internet. That's probably for a reason, and singing their music at karaoke is basically insulting the audience. It's also impossible to narrow down just one of their songs to put here because all of them sound exactly the same, and all are equally as atrocious.
Do you disagree with anything on this list? Do you think that Nickelback are the greatest American band ever? Are you currently haunted by the ghost of Whitney Houston and in need of some serious ghost busting? Sound off in the comments below!
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