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'Keeping Up With The Kardashians' Recap: Backdoor Bruiser

September 2nd, 2013 9:56am EDT | Samantha  Wilson By: Samantha Wilson

kards

As has been well established on Keeping Up With The Kardashians time and time again, Bruce Jenner often sticks out from the rest of his crazy family in terms of his conservative personality and nature. All he wants is for his stepkids to just rein it in a little bit with the way they talk in front of the younger siblings, and with what they share on social media.

For instance, when Scott finds a pair of handcuffs meant for the boudoir, Kourtney has no problem snapping a quick pic to share on Instagram. Khloe also made the sexy photoshoot she did for her anniversary public. This is all too much for Bruce to handle.

But nobody is more baffled than Bruce’s family when Kris reveals at dinner during this conversation that they once recorded a sex tape together. She claims that they immediately erased it, but no one believes this for a second. It’s now Kourtney and Scott’s mission – obsession – to find the tape.

Kendall goes horseback riding with her father, Leah and big brother Brandon, and is supposed to be joined by her mom (which seems kind of odd), but is disappointed when Kris shows up to the stables completely overdressed for the occasion. Five-inch heels and a skin-tight dress (she just came from work) aren’t going to work out on a trail.

Kendall’s mostly annoyed because she has decided that she is totally laid back now; she would rather hang out with the Jenner boys and surf than deal with the drama and nonsense of the Kardashians. She even wants a pickup truck just like Brandon owns. It’s all good and fine, but it mostly sounds like the flighty ramblings of a teenager.

But if this is a serious realization, good for her. Baby Jenner bird is flying away from the nest and from the looks of things, mama Kris is none too pleased with this development. How will she control the next phase of her empire if she’s off surfing with Brody all the time??

Khloe revealed something huge about herself that she has never divulged in all of the seasons and incarnations of the Kardashians shows. When she was just 16, she was in a terrible car accident that sent her flying through the car’s windshield, leaving her with a severe concussion. Ever since, she has suffered from horrible migraines and has difficulty remembering much of her childhood.

Her sisters were ribbing on her about not remembering yet another family memory, and it got her worried – what if she doesn’t remember this present day, the happiest time in her life – 10 years from now?

After trying to jog her memory by looking at photo albums and going to old elementary schools with no luck, she finally books an appointment with a neurologist. He calms her fears that she has early onset Alzheimer’s, but suggests that she set up an appointment with a hypnotherapist to see if that could help her unlock anything.

Meanwhile, in sex tape news, Kourtney and Scott can’t find the tape anywhere and have concluded that maybe Bruce wasn’t lying. But they still want to get him back for being such a hypocrite, so Kourtney comes up with a plan: they’re going to film a parody tape dressed as Kris and Bruce to make him see how ridiculous it looks.

And in costume, Kourt and Scott are uncannily like her parents. All it takes is a couple of wigs and the transformation is complete.

At hypnotherapy, Khloe is at first hesitant to participate because she’s under the impression it’s like getting hypnotized at the county fair. She doesn’t want to wake up naked or do something stupid on command. But the therapist is kind and just wants to help; she has Khloe relax and visualize different ages throughout her life.

They come to the root of her problems. It might not actually be the car wreck. Most of her problems with memory stem from her father – after his death she didn’t want to be around family because they reminded her of him, and the therapist says she is subconsciously pushing memories out of her head because they are too painful. With more therapy, they can hopefully come back.

Kourtney and Scott’s masterpiece, Backdoor Bruiser, is screened at a family dinner where Kris isn’t present because Bruce has terrible hearing and vision – aka when the action pops on screen, he thinks it’s actually him and his wife up there. And he’s furious. Kourtney tells him it’s fake and he admits defeat:

“I had six children with three different women, I guess I’m not one to talk.”

 

Grade: B+

Stray Observations:

-I’m no doctor, nor a therapist of any kind, but don’t you think that maybe the car accident that sent Khloe through a windshield is probably what caused her to lose her memory and not emotional issues?

-They say if you watch the Bruce Jenner sex tape that you’re cursed and there’s nothing you can do about it. Seven days.

-This was the mid-season finale, which is a fancy term for “Kim had her baby partway through the season we already shot so we had to scrap it.” New Episodes won’t be back until September 26th.

Photo Credits: NBC Universal, Inc.