'Keeping Up With The Kardashians' Recap: Season Finale
November 11th, 2013 9:18am EST
Can you believe it? We’ve made it to the end of another season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians together, but it seems like we’re the only people who made it out of the season intact. Hell, Bruce wasn’t even in the finale at all and there were zero mentions of baby North West. Raise your hand if you even knew that this was going to be the finale.
The last few episodes have made it apparent that E! and the Kardashians decided to rework this last part of the season around Khloe’s marital problems; there has been an awful lot of focus on Khloe and Lamar’s whereabouts – or lack thereof – to the point where it’s uncomfortably obvious that it’s been edited to point to her struggles. And hey, no blame to Khloe, as she’s clearly dealing with something rough, but it would have been more authentic if it hadn’t been “casually” alluded to with every conversation.
Like…Kourtney and Scott would not have been filmed having a conversation about how they never see Khloe and Lamar anymore, then call up the couple to invite them to sushi. The conversation is meant to frame the rest of the episode – that everyone is growing suspicious of Lamar’s constant absence – but it’s a scripted moment that’s too heavy-handed.
Really, the only person besides Khloe who knows what’s truly been going on is Rob, who still lives with them. As he explains on a hike with Brody, the stress of living in that negative energy and unhealthy environment has been taking a heavy toll on him personally. Brody backs him up when he says that he’s seriously thinking about moving out and living by himself for awhile, because it means he’ll get the chance to work on himself and finally get the motivation to get his act together.
Because Kris can’t do anything without being terrible, she decides to take it upon herself to clean Kylie’s room thoroughly, throwing out anything she deems trash and organizing down to the drawers. Needless to say, Kylie is livid – wouldn’t you be at 15? Nevermind the fact that nobody’s child over the age of eight needs help cleaning their room, Kris is delusional in thinking that Kylie would be thrilled by this “help” and doesn’t understand why nobody appreciates her. Because you do things like this, Kris.
Great big sister that she is, Khloe helps Kylie go through their mother’s closet and play the same game, throwing pair after pair of shoes into garbage bags as payoff for throwing away her beloved vases full of dead flowers (teens!). When Kris comes home in the middle of this catharsis, they get in another tiff that ends with Kylie dismissing her mother from her Sweet Sixteen party-planning duties. Okay…?
I forgot that this was Kris, and not a normal mother who would laugh at this kind of “punishment” from their child. Kris can’t function without complete control and hates that she can’t plan her daughter’s party. She gets over it pretty quickly when she has a better distraction, though – a teacup pig that Kendall is supposed to be babysitting.
Kris becomes obsessed with the piglet, renaming her Wilbur and draping her in bejeweled collars as she parades her around in a Louis Vuitton carrier. It’s a beautiful sight to behold.
And really, she didn’t need to be worried about the party at all; when Kylie says that she’s planning it herself, that’s rich teenager code for “using my mother’s team of party planners without her direct input,” so it’s basically flawless.
The party is Alice in Wonderland themed, as everyone loves drugs and whimsy, and it’s jam packed with all of Kylie’s friends and family. Perhaps the highlight of the affair is when a tipsy Scott gets cornered in the bathroom by a group of teens who demand to know who made his suit, then ask that he call them douchebags.
When I say that all of her family was at the party, there was one notable exception. Rob refused to go to the party because he was too insecure about his weight. That’s too far, and he’s finally starting to realize how out of hand his problems have become, that he can’t come to his little sister’s birthday party because he doesn’t want people to see what he looks like.
So Rob asks Khloe to sit down with him and they have a serious discussion about what’s been happening in their lives with Lamar. Granted, they never expressly name what he’s been doing, but anyone with internet access and a TV that has accidentally landed on TMZ once or twice or 50 times could tell you that Lamar has been battling a serious drug addiction.
Rob is of the serious opinion that Lamar is bringing both of them down, and while he loves him and respects him, he believes that constantly helping him, as Khloe keeps doing, is just going to do more harm than good. For his own sake, Rob tells her that he’s moving out immediately, so that he can get his own life back on track.
Khloe is visibly distraught, and questions why he needs to leave now, but the subtext is “why are you leaving me now?”
The season ends with a cliffhanger – is Khloe going to leave Lamar next?
Wow, they really don’t care about getting in any Bruce time now that the Jenner split has occurred, do they? There was absolutely no mention of the Bruiser at all during the episode, and he was only shown for a brief speck during Kylie’s party. I would bet money that E! rolls out their Jenner spinoff show starring Brody, Brandon, Leah, Bruce, Kendall and Kylie sometime early next year. It’s happening.
Next season, exactly how much Kim will we see? She has already expressed the fact that Kanye doesn’t want to be shown on screen and isn’t thrilled about the baby joining the cast either. Obviously, the engagement is going to be a major plotline, but afterwards – might there be a dropoff in Kim K Kontent?
Khloe, on possibly leaving Lamar because of his addiction: “If someone has breast cancer or gets their legs cut off, do you just leave them?”
Related: Brody Jenner, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, Kendall Jenner, Khloe Kardashian, Kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, Kris Jenner, Kylie Jenner, Lamar Odom, Rob Kardashian, Scott Disick, Starpulse Exclusives, Recaps, Television, Reality, TV Networks, E!
Photo Credits: NBC Universal, Inc.